JD Vance Proves Again What a Vile Motherfucker He Is. By Rude Pundit

Read time: 5 minutes

2/04/2024

JD Vance Proves Again What a Vile Motherfucker He Is

You think sometimes that you're inured to the blithe madness and the constant stream of fuckery from people in the Trump Party (formerly known as the "Republican Party"). You can hear a compliant little bitch like House Speaker Mike Johnson, who always looks like he really wants to tell you about the boy he keeps in a shed in his backyard, say something ridiculous like "The President has executive authority right now" to do what he wants with the border, and think, "Yeah, that's why Texas is totally listening to him when he says to take down the fucking razor wire." You can hear Nikki Haley burble whatever pathetic swipe she wants to take at the former president, and think, "Call him a 'rapist,' Nikki, or get the fuck out of the race." 

But every once in a while, one of these motherfuckers goes even further on one of the Sunday political gabfests and just says to everyone's face, "I am a genuine motherfucker. If I see a mother, I will fuck her. I will fuck all the mothers because I'm a motherfucker. It's right there in the word." And on This Week with George Stephanopoulos's Hair, Senator JD Vance proved that he's one vile motherfucker. It was honestly one of the most fucked up performances I've seen in a while, and I've watched prison shank porn.

From the start, Vance wanted to prove his ass was Trump's tightest dick koozie. When Stephanopoulos played clips of Vance in 2015 and 2016 shitting all over Trump, Vance didn't flinch to say he loved the man now. "He proved me wrong," the senator from Ohio gargled testicularly. "He delivered. He did a good job, and that's why I think we should give him another run at it." And that's all well and good. It's typical of the prone position that the entire Trump Party has taken with regards to its namesake, noted rapist Donald Trump. 

Then shit got weird.

Shown an ad that says how it's messed up to see a rapist get treated like a hero, Vance responded, "I think it's actually very unfair to the victims of sexual assault to say that somehow their lives are being worse by electing Donald Trump for president when what he's trying to do, I think, is restore prosperity." In other words, sexual assault victims should just shut up and enjoy it. And then he outright dismissed the idea that anyone could dare accuse rapist Donald Trump of being a rapist: "[The cases are] funded by Donald Trump’s political opponents. If you actually look at so many of the court cases against Donald Trump, George, this is not about prosecuting Trump for something that he did. It's about throwing him off the ballot because Democrats feel that they can't beat him at the ballot box." The E. Jean Carroll case started in 2019, but, as we learn again and again, facts don't matter, not even to a motherfucker who graduated from Yale Law School like a regular liberal cuck. 

When Stephanopoulos pointed out that juries found Trump is a rapist, Vance smirked bitchily, "These are juries, George, in extremely left-wing jurisdictions." Stephanopoulos pressed him with the logical question of why the fuck aren't jury verdicts valid if they're in "left-wing jurisdictions." Vance essentially said that they aren't valid so we can all go fuck ourselves with our stupid judiciary if we don't like the outcome. "When the cases are funded by left-wing donors and when the case has absolute left-wing bias all over it, George, absolutely I think that we should call into question that particular conclusion." No shit that where a case is adjudicated can have an effect. Welcome to our actual legal system. Check out that fucked Supreme Court. But according to Vance, it was a "weird jury in New York" that said the rapist raped E. Jean Carroll, and the whole case is "weird," which is a weird word to use on a rape case.

Then shit got darker.

Asked about what he would have done on January 6, 2021, Vance explained, "If I had been vice president, I would have told the states, like Pennsylvania, Georgia and so many others, that we needed to have multiple slates of electors and I think the U.S. Congress should have fought over it from there." In other words, pure fucking anarchy. A Democratic House of Representatives, a Senate waiting to see which party got a majority, and a Trump-knob-gobbler as vice-president would have had to figure out what the fuck to do, and likely the Supreme Court would have once again decided the outcome of the election. It's nonsensical, anti-constitutional, anti-American, and completely deranged. 

Just a side note here to reiterate that we have the dumbest fucking way of electing our president. I know we say that Republicans will never change the Constitution so that the president is decided by popular vote (or, you know, the way every other fucking country does it). That presumes that Republicans wouldn't moderate their stances in order to attract more voters. They'd have to, and they would probably have a shot at winning. But that would require them needing to be less nutzoid and putting the crazies who run the party back in the holes they crawled out of. 

Stephanopoulos, with increasing exasperation, asked if Vance thinks it's okay for the president to defy the Supreme Court. This was in the context of Vance making some mighty statement that President Rapist Trump should fire all lifetime civil servants and replace them with complacent lickspittles with the rapist's name tattooed on their faces, and that if the Supreme Court tried to stop the rapist, the rapist should defy the court. Vance twisted the question to if the court made an "illegitimate" decision, as in, "if the Supreme Court said the president of the United States can't fire a general, that would be an illegitimate ruling." But Stephanopoulos was finally done and cut off the interview, calling Vance "you traitorous cunt" and threatening to whip him through the streets of DC until he ran home to Mee-Maw.

No, Stephanopoulos didn't say that part after the comma. But he would have had every right to say it and do it.